Alas, the forces of revelry, unforeseen traffic and missed trains conspired against us and we got off to a slow start conceding several scores in the first 20 mins. Let’s say for arguments sake its 20-odd nil at this point. But despite a misfiring line out and pretty shoddy rucking at scrum time we were starting to gain the ascendancy until another try conceded coincided with Nelly dislocating a finger. Cue uncontested scrums for the rest of the game and our one notable toehold lost. Another conceded score and the anxiety of staring down the barrel of a big one going into the break was growing by the minute.

But we are made of sterner stuff than that and with the hangovers run out of the system Media came exploding out of the blocks at the beginning of the second period. A bullocking run down one flank saw Rich Willoughby put Tom Lindley in over the corner. This was swiftly followed by another score by Tim Britten (?) after some champagne link up play again with backs and forwards involved. Cue 39-10 which became 39-15 when Dan Jones was put over in the far corner. Had some loser not then dropped the ball with the tryline at his mercy then the fightback which Old Tiffs were palpably realising was on the cards could have been well and truly underway. Alas, it was not and the oppo ran out a couple more tries without reply to serve up a slightly undeserved 56-15 loss to the mighty Media.

So all in all a bad day at the office but we should be encouraged enough by the second half that there is no reason why we can’t put a win together in Battersea. Special mention to Dan Poulson and Nick Dabinett who were strong in the front five. Tom Lindley who had another good game at scrum half, Dai Rees whose opposite man will be having sleepless nights in the run up to the return fixture and Dan Jones who was solidity personified under the peppering of kicks he was fielding at full back.

DOTD: Sam Parker, aforementioned loser.

MOTM (3 way tie in Saturdays voting): Dan Jones, Tom Lindley, Dai Rees

The captain who cried wolf… So as per traditional London Media captaining methods, Vinny has been known to sway from the true KO time in a bid to get all the gents cut of the “unpunctual” cloth to at least get to the grounds in time to stretch and run some lines… Unfortunately a few of us cut from that cloth tried to call his bluff and get to the grounds for close to 2pm not realising that the KO 2pm actually meant KO 2pm… OUR BAD!!

From the looks of it, Raynes Park hardly got a decent run out, owing to the fact that they were probably still reeling from too many Boerie rolls and Castle Lagers down at the Wimbledon slug on Fri eve to watch Eastern Province Panthers play the mighty Blue Bulls in the Currie Cup….

1st half:

However from KO Media were in control, we had the downhill and the wind with us in the first half so knew we needed to grovel up a few points to keep a good level of comfort leading into the 2nd half… It was a slow start for Media as the game consisted of us coughing up way to many penalties early doors… Coach BGD counted up 10 in the first 30mins (probably closer to 15 on that basis)…

But with Raynes having only their #8 keen to run at us, they seemed content to let their weedy #10 pepper kicks onto our back three who were kept busy with the swirling wind, Dan the man at fullback did a good job considering he was more akin to bambi on ice at times trying to scoop up the difficult bouncing balls…

The order might be mixed up but to my recollection, Media started to open up their defensive wall early on with strong bollocking runs from Vinny and Chris White up front and Glynie finished off a sweeping move with a majestic sidestep to beat their fullback… I duly slotted the conversion to go 7-0 up…

Our obsession with giving away silly penalties hurt us on the scoreboard with the raynes park 10 slotting a few penalties to edge closer, however Media went on another rampaging run with our new addition Alex hitting it up hard, Georgey opening up some space for Baron to do one of his signature spinning NFL runs down the touchline, only being brought down by the fullback in the last tackle, he showed great awareness to pop it off in the tackle leaving me with an open try line… Conversion missed and Media went up 15 – 6…

Again the match slipped into a state of boring kick-chase from the oppo to close out the half..

2nd Half:

Media really turned on the champgane rugby in the second half despite the refs attempts to pick us off for anything and everything… The pack really started to dominate in the 2nd half, some excellent mauling work giving the platform for a scurry of pack tries… Dave Baxter clearly found his best performance to date, taking all the kick-offs with ease and finding himself in good supporting lines… Nicky Connors helped himself to a couple of tries, one where he had to sprint from the halfway line, surprising us all with being capable of such a feat! :) 32 - 12!

Donald was hard done by, rolling over for a try which was called “held up”…

Worrying attacks from the Raynes Park team were thwarted by aidy lundy’s numerous excellent interceptions… you could see the heads from the highveld drop everytime he managed to scuffle the ball from their possession

Vinny finally crossed the line and aptly chirped up “well thats my one for the season!”, however judging by his pace on the ball on sat, none of us

would be surprised if he starts chalking up a few more in the upcoming fixtures.. 41-12!

Raynes park summoned some inspiration to run with the rugby ball and managed to skirt over our touchline for a scrappy consolation try..

41-19!

A turnover from the kickoff resulted in some rumbling up the pitch by the pack and the media backline kept their width which resulted in an easy try for myself due to a superb long skip pass from Georgey… 46 -19!

Funnies:

The absolute delight the ref enjoyed when Raynes Park finally crossed our line for a late consolation score..

George having a go at their #10 for his incessant kicking of the ball.. .”C’mon mate you are boring me, are you guys ever going to run at us?”

Baron: For a man who had all the time in the world, he managed to make an absolute hash of clearing the ball from the 22, unless sideways kicking was the aim…? He clearly enjoys the taste of red-eye’s…

Vinny with another falcon to add to his haul this season, expertly taking one to the noggin after slipping through his fingers from the kickoff, luckily his falcons seem to ricochet backwards so his technique seems flawless.. his blue tape up work to cover his forehead cut deserves a “special” mention also…

Getting the Occies ref, Saffa Luke, absolutely smashed down at Si Cannon’s birthday gig…. No doubt worth a few penalties the next time we get him assigned to our fixture…

Not so funny:

Rich Freeman deciding to attempt breaking through tackles instead of a simple pass to me on his left and butchering the simplest of finishes.. Thats your one for the season pal!!! :)

MOTM / DOTD nominations:  [please note the red eye's will be handed out on the 17th]

Dave Baxter : top performance and impressed in his full league 80mins.

Nicky C : Sparkling return to form with some great runs and surprising pace on the ball, rewarded with 2tries for his endeavours..

Mentions:

Vinny : Best runs of the season, finally seeing the rewards of sprint training with sprint guru wayno…

Half-backs: Glyn and George dominated their opposition and gave the team direction.

Neilo : Good to see mr brooks complete his first 80mins of the season and provided solidity in the scrum..

DOTD: Hollywood Benny C (oh thanks again for your full participation in this rugby event by the way) dropping the ball with an open line in front of him in the 1st half… who can blame the man after not playing rugby for a while.. we will forgive you if you manage to get Paddy McGuinness’ missus down to watch one of our games.. I’ll bring dan luger..

Final score:

London Media 46 – Rayne’s Park 19

By far an incomplete performance and Old Radleian’s should provide a sterner test in a couple of weeks but we are certainly showing greater confidence in attack and our defense is looking very solid!

Tries:           Nicky C x2, Wayno x2, Vinny x1, Glyn x1, think one other..

Conversions: wayno x4

Penalties:     wayno x1

Wayno.

Now I cant really recall too much of the game as I was busy getting stuck in (yes Russ I was actually in the rucks and mauls not on the wing!) so here is my overview of the game and a few highlights gleamed from players after the final whistle chatting in the exercise yard……………

Once the ref eventually stopped lecturing us about how he was going to run the game he actually let us start, and after a sloppy start by yours truly, letting the kick off bounce and ricochet off a few of our players we cleared our lines and got stuck into a game that would prove to be a hard fought battle up front that would teach a number of our pack a few lessons on close contact play. Mitcham were a well drilled pack and chose their rucks wisely attacking when our pack let off the gas and securing an embarrassing number of turnovers against a pack that was superior in nearly every other facet of the game, but after a poor defensive performance a few weeks ago, Media had learnt their lesson and we defended well to stop Mitcham making any ground when we let them win our ball. In fact the only way Mitcham made any ground the whole match was through poor mistakes by Media and silly penalties coupled with our old nemesis Backchat!

When it came to scoring points I believe the two tries scored took place in the first half, with the first a well constructed one to Baron who managed to latch onto a well placed chip by BGD who only moments earlier had been telling the backline the effectiveness that such a little chip would be. Baron did some good running to beat his man on the outside and cut back through a number of defenders to touch down. The second was just before half time and went to our new ball scrounger Jake who eventually made it over the line after failed attempts by: Tom, Vinny, Chris and Donald I believe for a well worked team effort of continued pressure and quick ball recycling. I think Mitchams only response to this in the first half was a penalty conversion in front of the posts.

In the second half the attacking just didn’t appear to go our way with poor passes to props running awesome lines, dropped catches and lack of ball through too many turnovers, but when we were inside the oppo 22 we came away with points thanks to 2 penalty conversions off Fuzzy Bears boot, which was a good effort considering the conditions. Media also dropped off the intensity in the second half as we let in 2 easy tries to the oppo, the first from poor defending at the fringes (I know, I know) and the second from walking the oppo into our 22 with penalties and having to defend our own line under pressure.

In the end the better side won with a close score of 16-13 and many lessons were learned that will need to be rectified prior to our game this week against a much better side. So please come down to training tomorrow if your not already down to do so!!

The opposition looked a serious outfit with some nifty warm up t-shirts and some intense pre-game drills. In the first 15 minutes they lived up to this, having changed from their warm up tops to Argentine-esque jerseys. They came out of the blocks fast with some close running and the cultured boot of their 10 kicking in behind at almost every opportunity which eventually saw them down in our 22 and with hands on the ball. Some decent pick and go from Haslemere and some perhaps sleepy heads on the part of Media let to an early try for Haslemere… but that was to be the end of that!

For the rest of the first half Media put on all the pressure. Hard running chasers on the kick off, big clear outs at the rucks, big first up tackling and well returned kicks saw Media spend the whole of the rest of the half camped out on the opposition 22. In spite of the heat Media kept up the pressure for the second half which saw some scintillating rugby, some incredible line breaks, big hits and neat off loads. Real champagne rugby from a Media side starting to look very sharp indeed.

I’ve no idea of the scoring sequence but with another impressive score of 45-12 we saw BGD, Jacques, Simo (lady’s man) Cannon, Benny (the caterpillar) Crowder, Matt (line’s to die for) Armstrong, Mongo, and The fuzzy bear himself (Wayno) get on the score sheet, as well a handful of conversions by the fuzzy one.

Special mentions: First and foremost to the forwards as a pack, this was an immense effort in some serious heat, all oppo lineout’s were challenged while ours was solid and the scrum was a rock that gave a great platform for the free running backs (more to come) and the work at the breakdown put serious pressure on the oppo, disrupting any plans they might have had for doing anything other than a hoof to the ball, well done lads.

In the backs Wayno was playing like a man possessed, it was as if someone told him he could cool down and get some relief from the hot hot day if he smashed through at least 2/3 defenders every time he took the ball on. Benny (of all star family fortunes fame, if you’ve missed it http://www.itv.com/itvplayer/video/?Filter=277599) glided through the defence, BGD and Simo seemed to always be on hand to take off loads from both whenever a tackler actually decided to make a hit.

And finally to our man of the match, debutant Jake Goodman. With hard running, big hits and some lovely steals at the breakdown Jake was everywhere on the pitch and showing some seriously good skills. Great to see some fresh blood in the 1s.

Whether Media could cope with the ridiculous weight of expectation heaped upon them. And whether, and mutter this softly, the old maestros Wayno and BGD could still exert influence over important games. Crowder The Catapillar was astonishingly good. Television rarely provides proper perspective on rugby matches. It is great on detail and collisions, but it is useless when it comes to showing vision. There was one moment in the middle of the first half when the Media forwards looked like they were about to turn over Amplefordians ball. Crowder was 20 metres behind the breakdown at the time, but he sensed an opportunity and set off on a run which would have shattered the Old Amplefordians defence had anyone been on his wavelength to make the pass. The truth was he was too clever even for a Media back line which unpicked the Old Amplefordians defence with ease at times. If Crowder passed his individual test, then so did the side as a whole. All the fuss surrounding BGD’s 100th cap was extra pressure, as was the decision to trot out the throat-slitting Big Si rather than the more traditional, toned down Barry The Legend.

A chasm in class – as apparent in the ball handling skills of the respective teams as it was from their kits – was too much to overcome for Surrey 3 basement dwellers Merton on their visit to the corner of South West London fast becoming known as ‘Fortress Battersea.’ They succumbed to London Media 40-27 on a bright but brisk day as the scent of inevitability hung heavy in the spring air.

Buoyed by a rousing comeback on the road to table-toppers Worth the week before, favourites Media failed to make the opening salvo that they would have liked. Although Benny Buckley marked his return (from 11 days of sex tourism in the United States) by squirming over the whitewash, Merton had the impertinence to establish a 10-8 lead with a quarter of the game gone.

It should never have been so, as chances were butchered and possession ceded at crucial moments. By their own admission, some members of the side would have had more luck trying to catch a greased pig.

However, it wasn’t long before the team in black and white began to strut with the cock-sure authority of an 18th Century Parisian aristocrat, their power and pace proving too much for the yeomen of Merton.

Nonetheless, credit must go where credit is due, and despite fallingbehind, Merton held their heads high – and kept their body positions low – committing numbers to the breakdown much in the style of the Scotland side that went down so bravely to England on the following day. Keen students of the game will note that, for all their disruptive endeavor, both sides occupy a similar position in their respective tables.

That there is no substitute for talent was a maxim extolled with decisive clarity as Media began the second half with a glint in their eyes and ambition in their hearts.

The Scrummage was a bulwark of the performance, with Matt, Tom Butterworth and Donald providing stability and menace in equal measure; their efforts supplemented by the rest of the pack’s toil and the introduction of men who were the very personification of the term ‘impact substitution.’ Bullocking runs by the likes of Henry Gray, marking his return to the team; Benny Crowder, a physical specimen who would make Michelangelo’s David blush; and Rob (Benny Crowder’s chum), who made a convincing debut, made for gripping viewing as the dry track fuelled some incisive running rugby.

By the time BGD darted over the line (one onlooker was heard to remark that his white Nike Tiempos were more than a shade reminiscent of Hermes’ winged sandals), the ball game was sealed in fine style – the Man With the Tan finishing off a deft series of offloads that ran from the cool control of Nicky Connors, to a darting Benny B, into the muscular embrace of Wayno before his irresistible cocktail of strength and subtlety resulted in an offload that would have made Sonny Bill Williams’ prostate twitch with envy.

Before the 80 were up, there was time for a couple of soft tries in the other direction that, if nothing else, helped the losing side muster some self esteem in time for their retreat to the provinces.

But, to the victor, go the spoils, and Media march on to their next game with a bonus point win under their belts and everything to play for.

Who would have thought in the gloom of November and December that wewould have fourth place within our grasp? Young men: as the days grow longer and your thoughts turn to love, picnics and frivolity, remember what is at stake, maintain your focus, and declare your availability early.

Tries: Buckley, Skinner, Kavvy, Nicky Connors, BGD
Cons: Drayton (2)
Pens: Smith (1), Drayton (3)
(I think)

Ed

The first half began with opposition feeling the physicality of a big media side straight frmm kick off… To their credit old worth realised that running into the pack and 10 and 12 channels may hurt a bit so they employed a deft kicking game often putting the ball over a keen media defensive rush.

After a series of these kicks one found touch…. Bingo! thought media a chance to attack from a well worked lineout. Not so….. From the 1st lineout the opposition worked out our calls… I suppose it doesn’t take a genius when they are as simple as they are!!

This lead to some dominance of possession for the home team who were steady but not causing media too many issues as some great defensive work from the tight 5 and pack stifled there momentum. Media did have a bit of ball and what ball we had we certainly made use of with surging runs by Benny c and wayno along with the dancing feet of barry and theoutside backs! Old worth didn’t like this.

From a few great phases of play media managed to butcher no less than 3 try scoring opportunities!!!! Hands, calls, drop balls, knock ons ….. You name it we did it! The play leading to it all was poetry in motion, forwards and backs combining well to create space for eachother…… And then old worth scored, then again and again (only broken up by some dead eye kicking from Jonny W…sorry I mean ED…. But you wouldn’t know the difference By the Stroke of the ball from this fella.

This lead to a collective decision prompted by our leaders Phil, Wayne and bgd to start enjoying ourselves which we immediately did.

This period of enjoyment end with a media 5 pointer that we wer hellbent on fucking up, I mean we even through it forward at times,but we still scored it leave us feeling the 1st half should and could have been ours if we stopped throwing it away.

First half ended 20 – 8 to OWB

The 2nd began the same way the 1st ended with some delightful media power and incision. I could go on a name names but this email wouldn’t do it justice as there was some real quality dogged media displays from one and all.

As my memory for these things is shit I will talk in general with the odd moment of clarity chucked in….media were making now dominating territory and possession and avoiding line outs like an old school girlfriend gone bad!

There was some great interplay from the backs where Barry grew in stature (not literallay as he’s not really that tall…sorry mat, how was the theatre??!.. but metaphorically speaking) and his dancing Irish jig was leading the oppo backs on a merry tune along with Wayno’s ability to now find an off load or two to maruading forward like mongo and BGD.

Under this relenting pressure the home side started to fold and media could sniff a score or a two from boot and hand… this leading to a Matty special from a whole 5 yards out! Media were well and truly back in this game.

We were still butchering chances though… as one Tom Gerlach and Will shaw dicsovered when in a 2 on one I gave a pass that did true honor to shrove Tuesday… as it WAS as flat as a pancake …I swear… see ref for difference of opinion here.

This aside the momentum and a massive surge of media pressure on the Old worth boys told… the penelaties started to creep in and tired bodies on their team were there for all to see. This brought Media on massively.

It was at this point Phil realised we could kick ourselves to victory (well done Wayno!). We then duly went about levelling the score at 20- 20 and with a last minute kick won against the top of the league Old worth boys!!!

This oppo were a good side and it just goes to show what we are capable of if we keep playing to our strengths.

I firmly believe we are a team on the up and a side that the oppo hated when we keep possession and run hard at them. Great defensive work kept the shut out 2nd half and lead to wild jubilation at the final whistle!

Final score: 20-23.

MOTM: Benny C – and whole team to be fair.

DOTD: The ref… it was flat I swear.

Tom G